Tanned Mom and Wile E Coyote

Patricia Krentcil and daughter

Every time I see that over-baked mother on the news, I cringe, rolling my eyes in disbelief.   Have you ever seen anyone uglier?   Does Patricia Krentcil ever look in the mirror and jump back in complete disgust?   I’m sure she’s otherwise decent, working full time and supporting five kids, but maybe this once--while lying in oblivion under the cancerous lamps--she stepped over the line.    I say maybe.   Who actually knows?  She took her six year old daughter to the salon but swears the fair-skinned child never entered the booth and got sunburned playing outside.  Still, the little girl attended school the next day and must've said something about her tanning adventure because the nurse called the cops, and the rest, as they say, is history. 
Or a media nightmare.

 
And the story won't go away.  CNN regurgitates every creepy detail and comedians are having a ball.

  Jimmy Kimmel said she looks like Wile E Coyote--after he gets blasted with dynamite, and Kristen Wiil, who impersonated Krentcil, joined Seth Meyers at the SNL news desk looking dark and dumb.  Wiil displayed a piece of white bread, then placed it between her thighs.  When she pulled it out, it was brown.  “Toast,” she announced, and the audience lost it.  Every news show played the clip. 

Kristen Wiig

Even Kim Kardashian and the Octomom are joking about her.   They're making jokes?  That’s about as low as a story can go.

But I don’t hold anything against this leathery skinned mother.   Even if she made a stupid mistake, I hope they don’t prosecute.  The woman's got five kids, and I doubt she’d do it again.  Her older children are offended by the attention and want the media to disappear.  I bet their friends are laughing at them while busy texting pictures and notable punch lines to the rest of the class.

There's only one solution.   The woman’s ripe and ready for her own reality show.  Think that’s far fetched?  Her children will get over the embarrassment once they hear the money they’ll make.   All they need is one wacky mother.   

Stay tuned.