What Blew the Dinosaurs Away

brachiosaurus

Ever hear of the sauropods?  Those were the gigantic veggie eating dinosaurs that thumped and creaked over the earth during the Jurassic age, and passed enough gas to fart their way to extinction. 

At least that’s what some British scientists say.

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The methane gas produced by the largest and dumbest family to roam the earth helped warm our atmosphere, creating greenhouse gases that probably contributed to their ultimate demise. According to David Wilkinson, an environmental scientist from Liverpool, if you stood downwind of an Apatosaurus (formerly known as a brontosaurus) you could expect to by bombarded by a 2,675 gale of methane gas.  Add that to the thousands that roamed over the world—including Antarctica—and dinosaur flatulence produced between 500 and 600 million tons of methane gas a year.  

Whoa.   That’s a big you-know-what.   Of course it was not the entire cause of their extinction, but they say it was significant.                             

That's news, I thought, but it was way back when.  Still, I read on and learned that methane gas produced from cattle grazing around the planet today accounts for 2 percent of our greenhouse gases.  Two percent doesn't  sound like much, but it's forced the earth's temperature to rise from a half to one degree Celsius.  The scientists also said that this situation could be minimized by adding oregano or curry powder to the feed. If only the Apatosaurus knew.

 

But the whole thing got me to wondering.  There are 7,018, 014, 918  people alive at this time.   That’s over seven trillion, and if everyone suffered a little indigestion… 

So how come nobody told me?   Did Dr. Oz  zone out on gas?   He told me to stuff myself with blueberries, broccoli, and plenty of salmon, so I did.  He told me to take fish oil and get fifteen minutes of sun.  He told me to get my blood pressure checked but never a word about curry and oregano.

Hey, “Save Our Planet,” the bumper sticker warns.  

But how could I if I didn't know what to do?  Still I hesitated for just a moment.  Curry powder stinks to high heaven, emitting nauseating odors from the pores of my skin.  And it gives me...  Oh my goodness, gas.   But how could I not act upon the world's need?   If the earth can survive, then that’s what we need to do.

 

So remember the mighty sauropods and smell up your food and your belly so the earth won't crumble away.